Stop Pretending You Are Okay
We are “taught” from an early age to simply say we are okay, even if we are not. This is especially prevalent when we experience a loss. That loss could be many things, such as the loss of a friendship, the loss of a job or the loss of a loved one through death.
Most of us are ill-equipped to handle the loss. When we pretend we are okay, the pain and isolation we feel on the inside only stays and we have nowhere to safely express it.
I was in the place myself, after a heart wrenching miscarriage and subsequent collapse of my support community. I turned all my efforts toward work, as we tend to do. I kept myself distracted so I did not have to feel or acknowledge everything I had lost in such a short amount of time.
Over time my support community sort of returned to me but the safety I once felt with these people was no longer as strong. I felt lost and alone. The distraction worked on a professional front, I was quickly rewarded with more and more responsibility which meant more and more distraction. I thought it was the perfect path forward. However, eventually the distracting and avoiding caught up with me and I realized I was stuck in a hamster wheel that was exhausting and would no longer be sustainable. I had finally become aware that I needed new ways of dealing with my losses.
I sat down in front of the computer one day and googled “Grief Counseling.” I was terrified, I did not know what I was looking for or what to expect. I was lucky enough to find a counselor offering The Grief Recovery Method. I had never heard about it but I was drawn to it and knew I needed to try something. I was scared to have too much hope because nothing else had helped me with my pain, so why would this be different?
The program was immediately different from any other counseling I had experienced. The program started by helping me to understand why nothing else had worked for me. I was finally learning the skills necessary to deal with the loss.
It is hard to explain exactly the result I experienced through using the Grief Recovery Method but what I can tell you is I experienced a sense of relief I had never experienced before in my life. In almost no time at all, I was able to become complete with the loss. It was from this place I was able to move forward, not from a place of brokenness, but from a place of peace. It was unbelievable and surprising and wonderful.
The great thing about this method is it works for any of the 40+ documented losses that people experience in life. And you could use it for any and all losses you have, or will, experience.
Want to know more? Want to experience this yourself? Join us for the ReCover You program (on your own or in one of our groups) to learn and practice these important skills. You can then stop pretending you are okay because you will really be okay.
